What to Say (and Not to Say) to People Experiencing Homelessness
Homelessness is a challenging reality for many, and the way we engage with those affected can have a significant impact. A simple act of kindness and respect can make a world of a difference. However, even with good intentions, we may sometimes say things that unintentionally come across as insensitive. With that in mind, let’s explore how we can be more mindful of our words, focusing on what to say- and what to avoid- when speaking to individuals experiencing homelessness.
What to Say:
- “Hi, how are you doing today?”
- Sometimes, it’s the little things that matter. A simple greeting or smile shows that you see them as a person, not just someone without a home. Asking how they’re doing opens the door for a friendly conversation if they’re up for it.
- “Is there anything you need right now?”
- Instead of assuming what they might want, this question gives them the chance to let you know what they truly need. Maybe it’s food, water, or just a moment to talk.
- “Would you like some help finding resources or shelters?”
- Offering practical help, like pointing them to local shelters or services, is always appreciated. If they’re open to it, you could even look up nearby organizations that specialize in outreach for people experiencing homelessness.
- “I don’t have money, but can I get you something to eat or drink?”
- If giving cash doesn’t feel right for you, offering to buy food or a drink is a great alternative. It shows you care and want to help in a way that feels comfortable for you.
- “Everyone deserves respect and kindness.”
- A simple reminder that everyone is worthy of dignity. A statement like this can help break the stigma and highlights respect for all people regardless of circumstance.
- “Would you like to talk?”
- Homelessness can be incredibly isolating. Just offering a moment to chat can be really meaningful for someone who may not get to talk to others much. Sometimes, just listening can make all the difference.
What Not to Say:
- “Why don’t you just get a job?”
- This question might seem like a quick fix, but it’s dismissive and can feel judgmental. There are often many barriers like mental health, trauma that make it hard for someone to find work, even if they want to.
- “You don’t look homeless.”
- Homelessness doesn’t have a particular look. Some people experiencing homelessness might not fit the stereotypes we have in mind, and comments like this can downplay their struggles or make them feel like they have to prove their situation.
- “Things will get better soon.”
- While this might seem encouraging, it can feel empty. Sometimes people don’t want vague hope they need actual help. Offering support or resources is more helpful than just saying things will improve.
- “You’re lucky you don’t have bills to pay.”
- It’s easy to forget that not having bills doesn’t make up for the hardships of not having a stable home. This comment can feel dismissive, as it minimizes the seriousness of their situation.
- “Why don’t you just go to a shelter?”
- Many people avoid shelters for valid reasons: overcrowding, safety concerns or theft. Instead of questioning their choices, try offering help in finding resources that they’re comfortable with.
- “You should have made better choices.”
- This is one of the demeaning things you can say. It implies that homelessness is a direct result of bad decisions, ignoring factors like job loss, medical expenses, or domestic violence. It’s unfair and hurtful.
In our everyday interactions, small gestures of kindness and empathy can have a profound impact on people experiencing homelessness. The way we communicate matters, and being mindful of what we say—or don't say—can help foster dignity and connection. Let’s be intentional in offering respect, support, and understanding to everyone, regardless of their circumstances. Together, we can make a difference, one conversation at a time.
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